NEVER Worth It, Yet ALWAYS Worth It

I had a thought come to me today that hit me hard and was too 'good' to not share.  Relationships are almost never worth it.  But, somehow they are always worth it.

I'm thankful for the voice God has given me on what I'm about to share, because I know that God takes ashes and makes them beautiful.  I know that someday my story of what God has brought me through will be a testimony that will see others walk through their own versions of what I've experienced and get to a place of victory and healing.

So, relationships are almost never worth it.  But, somehow they are always worth it.

What a contradiction.

Relationships are never worth the pain they bring.  They are never worth the agony that sometimes is felt.  They are never worth the tears that are shed when betrayal hits hard.  They aren't worth it when someone you value says they're done and don't want you in their life anymore.  They aren't worth the effort it takes to see healing that never seems to come.

As I've never been in a dating type relationship, or never been married, I only have friendship experiences.  But, I'm pretty certain those feelings can be felt in a dating relationship when one party hurts the other party, or in a marriage when a husband or wife acts in a manner that brings grief or sorrow to the other spouse.  And, believe me, if you haven't felt these things, you aren't human.  Every single person to ever live has walked through moments like those I mentioned.  And sadly, many even face things much worse in relationships that truly make them "not worth it."

So, if I just said relationships aren't worth it, how can I then say they ARE worth it?

Are they worth the pain they bring?  Are they worth the agony and tears that are shed?  Are they worth walking in the face of potential betrayal?  Are they worth it when in an instant it can end when someone says they could care less about you?  Are they worth the effort it takes to work through mistakes and failures and misunderstandings?  Are they worth the effort of working through things that you don't want to work through, but you know if you do healing will come?  Are they worth it at all?

Yes.

Yes, they are worth all that.  They are worth the risk.  Even if at the end of the day one party says goodbye, that relationship was STILL worth it.

It is worth it because it presents you with an opportunity to love deeply.  It is worth it because God created us with a desire...with a craving...to be in relationship, and by being in relationship we walk in the purpose God intended for our lives.  It is worth it because without it we would never experience the joy God intends to bring into our lives through that person.  It is worth it because even when pain comes, we grow and mature.  It is worth it because every single soul is WORTH IT.

When God created Adam, He didn't intend for Adam to walk in a world of sin.  Sin is what brings all the 'not worth its' above.  Sin is what causes the hurt, betrayal, mistakes, and division.  All those things we feel in those moments are not worth what we feel because if you look at relationships as an investment, all those things take withdrawals from the relationship.  The sheer amount of all those things we face during the course of a relationship can outweigh the joys.  Does that mean we regret the relationship or refuse to enter into relationship?!  NO WAY!

As I sat back today, thinking about all these things, looking at situations around me that 'withdraw' from my desire to enter into relationships, all I hear is God saying "Yes, it's ALWAYS worth it."  Though the things of this world take away from the life-bringing relationships God intends us to have, the amazing thing is that God is a relationship-building God.  When we yield our lives to Him, He brings unity.  He brings healing to those broken situations.  He brings joy in the morning.  He brings peace.  He brings hope.  He brings life.  He brings testimonies that could only be birthed in a place of pain.  He makes all the 'not worth its" worth it.  Because He died for each and every one of us.  So, if we are striving to live in the love that He demonstrated, then we too will see that every life is worth loving as Jesus loves.  That's the cry of my heart.  That despite the 'not worth its' that I've encountered, that I would still choose to say "It's worth it because God is doing something bigger than I can see.  It's worth it because without encountering the friends, future husband, and others that I'll be in relationship with, my life would be different because they bring something into the story of my life that is unique to them...it's something amazing and valuable.  It's worth it because I have the honour of loving deeply, and despite the earthly pain that risk takes, in heaven, that'll be worth it when we relate side by side in the unhindered presence of Jesus...where all sin and schemes of the enemy are destroyed and there is only unity in Christ.  That's worth it."