Not Like This...

It was never supposed to be like this...

An ending so quick and hard...

A dream blown into the wind...

All hopes crashed...

BUT, God is faithful. 

And I am so grateful for the chance He's giving...

To you, my dad, to begin afresh...

This journey's almost over, and a new one's about to begin...

I love you!

 

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Yesterday was Sunday.  The Sunday before Canada Day to be exact, so my church decided to have a pancake breakfast and outdoor service.  It was a nice day, and seeing that I am not a strawberry blond with really pale skin, I did not figure it wasn't warm enough to wear sunscreen.  With the wind blowing, I did not think that an hour and half outside would be short enough to stay outside unprotected from the actually very harsh sun. 

When we got to church and my mom asked if I wanted the sunscreen, I definitely did not say no, and I was not too ashamed to put the strong smelling lotion on my back.  No, I have more common sense than that. 

So now, I am NOT dealing with the after effects of the worst sunburn I've had in my entire life...Nope, not me!

Here's my back:  (Sorry it's such a bad picture...I was trying to use the mirror so I could capture the full burn...)

I couldn't get a good picture of my left arm.  The burn is so big that every picture I took only showed red.

So, so finish this Not Me Monday Post...

I did not learn a lesson about the truth about how pride goes before a fall...

Watching Them Grow

Back in April, and May I posted some pictures of the fruit blossoms in my yard.  You can see the photos here and here. 

Over the past 2 months I've been 'watching' the fruit grow (another part of my love for gardening) and so I thought I would share some photos with you.  So here is the fruit (as of today)...

Most Can't Stand Weeding...I Love It!!

Weeding is a stress reliever/downtime/wind down for me.  Most people I know cannot stand weeding, but I love it!  With weeding comes a sense of accomplishment.  You can take something that looks hideous and turn it into something beautiful.

Much like this garden...

A couple days ago it was full of weeds and unkept grass...

Today it looks tidy and ready for the flowers to start blooming...

Tear Jerker

I was watching bits and pieces of America's Got Talent tonight and my favourite act is the following video.  The entire time I watched it I was holding back tears.  So be warned, you may need some tissue. 

Living In A Dream

Have you ever felt like you're living in a dream and no matter what you do everything seems hazy and pretend, and you try to wake yourself up but can't because you're actually facing reality? 

That's how I've been feeling lately.  I feel like I'm walking through a fog.  Sometimes I think the upcoming move was just a dream and my life is how it's been for the past 10 years.  But then reality hits and I realize this is no dream.  I really am embarking on a new journey.  I really am going to be leaving the beautiful city I live in.  I really am going to be leaving the people I love behind.  Even the thought of it brings tears to my eyes.

In all honesty I feel silly writing about my hardships relating to moving when so many people have experienced worse things.  But I guess in everyone's life there are different seasons.  Some people, for reasons I will never understand on this earth, go through horrible situations, while others go through different hard circumstances, yet each of the situations make us stronger.  God knows what we can each handle. 

Right now my season of life is filled with many unknowns.  And in all honesty, I'm really terrified about what the future has in store.  Change has never, ever, been something I would choose.  I'm just fine where I am at, and if I could stay here forever I would, but unfortunately that is not a choice right now.  So, I must embrace the reality that this is not a dream, though I would appreciate if it was.  In just around 2 months I will be starting something new...something exciting yet terrifying. 

I just don't want to leave the people I love behind...

I don't want to leave this beautiful city behind either...

June 15

June 15.  A day that will always hold sorrow.  A day that will always have joy.

I come from a close knit family.  I'm close with most of my immediate relatives (my parent's brothers and their families, as well as my grandparents), and I'm also close with my mom's mom's side of the family.  Every few years we have a family reunion where we fellowship, laugh, and play lots of games, and make memories that will last a lifetime!  Out of all my extended family, this is the side we know the best. 

My Great Grandpa Siggelkow, the head of this family, always loved to visit with everyone...his children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.  He loved it when we all got together. 

He was also very healthy and active.  He was in a bowling league with my Great Grandma, and so on his 90th birthday they went bowling.  He never wanted to slow down.  A few years back they moved into a seniors type building, but due to the lack of yard, they moved to a different place where they had a nice home and a yard with a garden! 

So, when we got a phone call sometime in March 2008 saying Great Grandpa was having trouble breathing and was in the hospital, it was a shock for the entire family.  Looking back on it, I think I thought it was something minor like pneumonia, but little did we know it was so much worse than that. 

He got testing done, only to find he had something wrong in his lungs, and the little things in the lungs that expand to allow oxygen to come into the lungs had kind of hardened.  I don't know much of the terminology, but they way I think of it is like a old rubber band that can't stretch anymore.  Great Grandpa had to be put on oxygen and they only gave him a couple months to a couple years to live.  It was devastating!

On the morning of June 15, I was upstairs in the kids wing of my church when my dad came up and told me Great Grandpa had gone to be with Jesus.  I knew it was coming to that, but when I found out couldn't have been worse timing, but at the same time it couldn't have been better timing.  I was broken.  He was the only Great Grandpa I saw on a regular basis.  I was supposed to lead a song that day, but due to what was going on in my life, I told my friend (the worship leader) I wouldn't be able to lead.  He asked me what was wrong and so I told him.  He immediately prayed for God's peace to be upon me.  And in the midst of my pain, God showed me how much He cares.  He showed me that He brings people into our lives who will love and care for us despite what we're going through.  So, even in my grieving God gave me reason to smile.

So in a nutshell, that describes June 15 and why it holds sorrow.  But how can it also hold joy?  This is why it holds joy...

My Great Grandpa was an incredible man.  When I think of him I always think of a song my mom's cousin sang at one of our family reunions.  I don't remember all the lyrics, but it talked about a legacy of love, passed down to the sons and the daughters.  My Great Grandpa left a legacy for all of his family to walk in.  It's not a legacy of fame or wealth, it really is a legacy of love...love for each other but most of all a love for God.  And that's why I can be joyful.  I know I'll see my Great Grandpa one day, and when I see him, I'll get to see my Great Grandma Clara as well.  (She died before my mom was even born and my Great Grandpa remarried my Great Grandma Hilda).  I am so grateful for the legacy my Great Grandpa Sigglekow left for us...

Wipeout!

My friend's husband just signed up to be in Wipeout Canada!!  I'm so excited and hope he gets chosen to be on the show!

Here's his audition: 

Feel free to share encouraging comments, or just simply press the like button.  The more views the video gets the better the chances of getting in if it comes down to popularity. 

Here's the video:



For some reason the size isn't correct...sorry about that.

Remembering the Journey...

September 2007 I embarked on a journey...a journey that went by way too fast.

I graduated from high school in June 2007 and university was something I really wasn't ever interested in going into.  There's a Bible School in my grandparent's little town that most, if not almost everyone in my family who went to Bible School went to.  I didn't have a desire to go their either (for no reason imparticular...I just wasn't interested).  But I did have to do something, and when my dad began to start preparing for what would be known as Intense Discipleship Training Centre (ID), my mind was made up...I wanted to go there.

The timing worked out perfectly...the first ID year started in September 2007.  There ended up being 5 of us who started upon this journey together...me and 4 guys.  (Coming from a family of 4 girls and ONE boy this was complete culture shock for me!  But later on when things changed I found myself missing the "good old days" when there was just me and the four guys...)

We went on a couple trips to the coast of BC...

In my first year of ID we went to Victoria for a day to meet up with Tim Schindel and experience the work he is doing there with Leading Influence Ministries.  That was a neat experience!  My dad and I were able to witness a pretty exciting once in a lifetime happening while we were there.  This trip was very instrumental in bringing the class closer together.  We all were able to go except one of the guys...and I will carry the memories of that trip in my heart forever. 

Then in second year, we were able to go down to Vancouver to be apart of Passion Vancouver!  Again, this was an incredible experience!  There were thousands of people there who were lifting up the name of Jesus!  It was AMAZING!!  And actually, Louie Giglio and the Passion team are coming back to Vancouver this November, and though I'm moving I am really, really hoping I am able to take part in it again!  There's just something about worshipping Jesus with thousands of other Christians! 

Okay, back to ID...

I learned SO much in ID. 

Each year consisted of 4 modules which were focused on different themes.  For example, we went through modules on Foundations, Character, Gifts and Callings, Leadership, Life Planning, Relationships,Outreach and Evangelism, and Church Ministries.  In each of those areas we learned A LOT (that's why it was INTENSE Discipleship :)

The program was designed to be a two year course, so I went through first year and second year.  We started out with 5 at the beginning of year one, and then later that year one of my classmates left due to his job and another one (a lady!) came.  By second year there were 11 of us! 

My dad ran the school out of our church.  It was his dream, and he loved it!  I am SO grateful everything worked out for me to be a part of my dad's dream!

So, why am I writing all this today?  Today is a very bitter sweet kind of day for me...

Due to decisions beyond our control, it was decided that after second year ID would not continue.  That news was tough to take.  Every single one who went through ID had their lives changed for good...they grew in God.  It had been my dad's dream to run a discipleship school like ID.  And in an instant it was over. 

One year ago on this Sunday in June, we had our final ID Recognition Sunday.  And today I just want to remember the journey God allowed me to go on, the people he let me become friends with, and the beginning of a seed God allowed my dad to plant in 12 individuals lives. 

There is so much more that ID held, but for right now, I think I want to go on another little journey...a journey of memories...

This one always makes me laugh...Not great quality wise, but great memory wise :)

One of my dad teaching...because ID wouldn't have been what it was without my dad's organization, commitment, enthusiasm, time and effort... Thanks Dad!

And last, but not least is a Bible.  ID was what it was because God gave a dream to my dad, and that dream was watered by prayer and action and the dream became reality.  ID was God centered...and we all grew leaps and bounds in Christ as we learned what it meant to be a disciple of Jesus Christ!

Thank You Lord for the opportunity I had to be a part of what You did in ID!

Love of Guatemala

It's no secret that after I went to Guatemala in 2005 I fell in love with the people and the country.  So, whenever I hear anything that has to do with Guatemala my ears instantly perk up. 

It helps that my mom's cousin is married to a Guatemalan, and she often posts Guatemalan news on Facebook (since it doesn't come through on our Canadian channels.) 

Anyway, this morning I found out about a crazy natural disaster in Guatemala that happened sometime in the past day or so. 

Check this CNN news article out.  It is absolutely crazy!!