Motivation

Distance schooling is HARD work!  When I signed up for it I didn't expect it to be nearly as time consuming as it is!  I homeschooled for a few years, so I figured distance university would be similar, but no it is not!  The more time I spend doing my school work, the more I find myself missing the classroom setting where the professors do all the material condensing and tell the students what they need to know and what they don't!  I guess the whole process of reading, trying to understand, filling out worksheets, answering questions, and so on is good for me though! 

With all that said, I admit I am really behind in my courses.  Well, I guess not "really", though it feels like it.  Technically I have until the end of April to finish, which means as of yesterday I should be half finished my courses.  I am close to being half finished math, as well as my health class.  I'm pretty behind in my basic biology course, and my anatomy course is far from my mind right now.  I have until the end of October to finish that one, so I'm not working on it until after April...  I am so glad I decided not to do my second semester of school right now!

So, seeing that I'm so behind in school I decided a little motivation might just be what I need to put the pressure on me to get it done! 

Fast forward about 1-2 weeks... I was thinking to myself that I need to go on vacation.  That is an odd thing for me, especially since I JUST was away a month ago!  Nevertheless, I was talking to my mom and I told her that I thought I needed to go somewhere green (it is beyond white here!  I'm more than ready for spring to arrive!) Then mid last week my friend who's in Ontario out of the blue told me I should come visit her...  That was very unexpected...I don't think she has EVER said I should visit her there...Usually if we are going to get together it's when she's in Calgary.  Then, no joke, on Sunday I was talking to my best friend and she said I should go visit her in New York!  Crazy! 

Coincidence, or not (I personally think not...) these three moments really got me thinking.  Really, there is no better time for me to go than now.  If I wait, it may turn out that I would never get the opportunity to go out east.  I have never been as available to just pick up and go somewhere as I currently am, and if I get into nursing in the fall, it will be years before I will be able to again...and even then I'll have a "real" job to try to work my schedule around.  All that being said, I made a bargain in my head...IF I can get done my two Math TMA's (teacher marked assignments), schedule my midterm, write my health paper, and possibly schedule that midterm ALL before the end of the week I will reward myself with an early birthday gift and go out east to visit my friends...

So, with that as my motivation I BETTER get it all done this week!  Because I'll be sad if I don't, but even then (and really, I shouldn't even let myself think this way...) I'm sure I'll break down and go anyway. 

But, I'm not really going to think like that because I need to get my school done...  So basically I'm going to be doing nothing but school for the rest of the week... I figure if I work non-stop from sun up until sun down tomorrow I should be good to go for the math...I hope!! 

I'm going to make this trip work...if it's the last thing I do!  I just can't help but think that there may be a God appointed reason for why this is all coming together the way it is... Karissa has been on my heart and mind pretty much non-stop lately.  I just can't shake the feeling that God has so much more for her and that soon she'll 'wake' up to it.  So to see her after it's been over a year would be amazing!  And to see Kim at LIFT...that would be awesome!  The weird thing is that almost every single aspect of LIFT that I've heard about, or seen on their website (except all the outdoor activities) is EXACTLY what my dad had wanted to do with ID...  Everything about it.  It's honestly like ID in the USA...only it was given a chance to grow, and is now thriving.  It was encouraged instead of smothered.  So coming from that angle, to be able to see first hand just what the setting is like there and to maybe somewhat see how it's run would be pretty neat.  I have a feeling I'd feel at home there!  And seeing Kim is seeing my best friend...need I say more?!  That would be a blast!!!!!!

So MOTIVATION!!!  Time for bed so I can have an early start to my math day!  Math and tea...that'll be my day!

Stand In Awe

I was just going through a few of my old ID eJournals that I wrote around this time two years ago, and I came across one that is about something I have been thinking about lately. 

Here it is...

October 16, 2008
            This week, as I was reading Ecclesiastes 5, the first part about standing in awe of God really stood out to me.  In the devotional book, Pure, by Rebecca St. James, one of the days is titled “In Awe.”  This particular devotion defines awe as being overwhelmed by God’s majesty.  With this definition in mind, I saw this chapter differently than other times.  As Solomon goes through verses 1 to 8, the greatness of God is very evident.  God is so big, but yet He desires to live inside every human being.  This is such an overwhelming concept that all we can do is just stand in awe of God.  As much as God holds the universe in His hands, He is walking beside us and making our paths straight.  I guess this is something that I need to work on trusting.  I need to trust that God knows what is best for me, as well as for everyone around me.  I need to work on not worrying about the future, but rather, standing in awe of God, knowing that His ways are better than mine.  I guess this goes hand in hand with verse 7, which talks about how “much dreaming and many words are meaningless.  Therefore stand in awe of God.”  It’s so easy to let the flesh go down its natural path and worry, but rather, we all need to discipline our lives so that we can take control of our flesh instead of letting our flesh take control over us.  This needs a lot of work and prayer, including a daily submission to God, but as we allow the Lord to have control over our lives, trusting and standing in awe of Him will slowly become part of our daily lives.  It is something we all need to work on, with God’s help, so that we can be confident that His ways are higher than ours, causing us to have fewer meaningless dreams and words and have more awe of God.